Picture this. You log into your Facebook account, only to be bombarded with yet another picture of your friends hand, adorned with a sparkly new engagement ring. As you click over to offer your congratulations, you can’t help but wonder when it will be your turn. When it seems like every person around you is getting engaged, you might struggle with jealousy, inadequacy and feeling like you’re falling behind your peers. Many women are afraid to admit feeling this way, but it doesn’t mean that you aren’t happy for your friends.
Here is how to handle it when all your friends are getting married…and you aren’t.
First, be honest with yourself. When you hear that a good friend was proposed to last night and it makes you want to burst into tears, don’t hastily push your feelings to the side and ignore them. Be kind to yourself. Take a moment to determine why the news sparked such an intense response within you, and if the tears need to flow, let them out! Of course, make sure you do this before you run out to give your friend a big hug. Pretending that everything is okay and stifling your feelings only causes them to grow, until one day you explode. Try to gain some perspective on what exactly is bothering you-are you lonely? Have you always wanted to get married and you are frustrated that life isn’t going according to plan? Are you dealing with a breakup of a relationship that you thought was going to be your happy ending?
Next, step outside of yourself. Chances are your engaged friends are so excited about wedding planning-and they want nothing more than to share their happiness with you. Don’t push them away or isolate yourself, not only will this damage your friendships, but it will do you a huge disservice. Don’t rain on their parade and constantly make comments that make them feel guilty for planning a wedding. In essence, keep the focus on them. If you are really struggling, choose another friend or family member to talk with about it-not the blushing bride to be!
Finally, instead of wondering why your heart hasn’t found it’s permanent happiness, make it your mission to make yourself happy. Keep yourself busy with new hobbies and interests, sign up for online dating if you aren’t already doing so, and enjoy each day you have as a single woman. When you are happy no matter what your relationship status, the opposite sex is naturally drawn to you, and love has an easier path to find you! More than likely it won’t be too long before it’s your hand and bling showing up in everyone’s newsfeed.
- License: Creative Commons image source
We Love Dates is a worldwide online dating site. For more dating advice and tips, visit their We Love Dates blog.